Crazy Bus

Bus Man: Would you like to make a donation?

Ronnie: Nah.

Bus Man: Why not?

Ronnie: (matter of fact) Cause some of the stuff on your bus is homophobic and I'm gay so I really can't support it.

Bus Man: (lovingly) You're not gay.

Ronnie: (smiling) I am.

Bus Man: (seriously) Can I tell you why you're not gay?

Ronnie: (smiling) Not today. I gotta go.

Ronnie gets in the car and drives down the road. He thinks to himself.

"Great job, Ronnie. Another missed opportunity. You should have stayed and let him tell you why you're not gay. It would've been interesting. Now you'll never know why he thinks you're not gay. And where the hell is your video camera. This would've been a great little video. You could've filmed the bus, him talking, your reactions...this whole thing was one big missed opportunity. And why didn't you donate, asshole? The man takes all that time to paint his bus and put these amusing sayings out there and you make a mini-protest by withholding a few bucks. What if you would have said:

"Hey, I'm gay but I love your bus and I admire you for putting yourself out there and believing in something and expressing yourself. I support your right to say crazy shit. I'm gay and here's 10 bucks. When you spend it, know you're spending gay money, ok!"

This could've been golden but instead you walked away. Life only happens once, my friend. Don't run from the crazy bus! Jump on it. Are you listening?

Me: I should've stayed. You're right.

Myself: I know I am. Don't tell me I'm right. I hate when people tell me I'm right when I know I'm right already. Don't tell me what I know, tell me something I don't know. You fucked up man!

Me: I fucked up. The next time I see the crazy bus I won't make the same mistake. I'll stay and find out why I'm not gay.

Myself: Good man!