GLAAD Riddance

The simple minds at GLAAD (Gay Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation) are at again, tossing off accusations that American Idol is homophobic. Where do these morons get off? Do they honestly believe these accusations or is it just a slow news week and they want some attention?

The only act of homophobia I witnessed this week was Isaac Mizrahi’s internalized homophobia manifested in a red carpet minstrel show in which he adopted the persona of an unfunny, stereotypical fashion designer. I believe that Mizrahi is a thoughtful, intelligent human being, so why the need to act like a screaming, queenie fool with a microphone? If GLAAD could answer that question they might actually be useful.

Why do some gay men feel the need to act out in ways that misrepresent who they really are? The Queer Eye guys seem to be on a mission to convince the world they are frivolous, shallow human beings. Mission accomplished. The Fab 5 probably aren't shallow and insipid in real life, but they want us to think they are. For what purpose? I don't get it. GLAAD, can you help me understand?

GLAAD should look inward before it looks outward. Problems that plague the gay community do not include Simon Cowell and Paula Abdul. Drug addiction, STDs, unsafe sex, alcoholism—these are huge issues that need to be addressed. Instead, GLAAD focuses a detective’s glare where there is no crime. No gay man will seroconvert this year from watching American Idol. Simon Cowell's bitchy comments won't get any gay men hooked on crystal meth. Gay men get DUIs leaving gay bars not sitting home watching TV.

Grow up, GLAAD Media. I beg you! Grow up. You are over. You have outlived your usefulness. You are a dinosaur. Shut up and go away. If someone offends me I'll speak up for myself, thank you very much. I don't need you fighting my battles. You are the Donald Rumsfeld of the gay community, and just like Rumsfield, your attacks are poorly thought out, poorly timed and ineffective.

Last week a friend asked me to recommend a gay movie he could show to his loving parents about happy gay men with supportive parents. Two days later I stumble into the new film The Family Stone. Have you seen it? I haven't heard you talk about it.

The Family Stone is probably the most positive gay movie of the year!

I loved Brokeback Mountain. I've seen it three times, but there is nothing groundbreaking in its handling of homosexuality. Self-loathing homosexuals are no stranger to the big screen. Kiss Kiss Bang Bang and The Family Stone are truly groundbreaking gay films because self-loathing on any level is absent from the script. For the first 30 minutes of The Family Stone I wasn't even sure the couple was gay because no one talked about it, because no one cared, because it was a NON-ISSUE!

GLAAD, you and Pat Robertson share a common bond. You both make idiotic comments before you think. You both cry fire where there is none. Arial Sharon wasn't stricken down by God and American Idol isn't homophobic.

Keep fighting the wrong battles. That's how bad regimes fall.