A loooong weekend with no no cell phone service, no wireless connection and no sex hardly sounds like a vacation to me. Not that I didn't enjoy myself; the cabin-house-monstrosity was HUGE and luxurious (and in the middle of nowhere) but the most "relaxed" I felt in the last 5 days was returning to my home and watching Meet the Press this morning at 5 AM by myself. I love my family more than I can ever express but "family" is a complicated thing.
My two sisters have men in their lives that strike me as less than stable and I have serious reservations about my Dads fiance. I spent 3 hours of the trip begging him to postpone his wedding but my Dad has never been swayed by my opinions. I believe he's making a huge mistake marrying this woman. I hope I'm wrong.
I write this cause I know my Dad, his fiance, and my two sisters don't read my blog but even if they did they wouldn't be shocked. I had a heated exchange with my Dad and his fiance and my sisters know I question their judgement when it comes to men.
There was a land line in the house that both my sisters' boyfriends managed to get and it rang constantly. Very annoying!
And my Dad's fiance asked me if I get lonely living alone and when I told her that I LOVE living alone and having my life exactly as I want it, she implied that I was self-centered. I countered with this:
"Everything we do is self-centered. The act of eating is self-centered. Sleeping is self-centered. Breathing is self-centered. It's your job as a human being to be self-centered. If you don't take care of yourself how can you ever be available for others?"
She countered with:
"I know a couple with no kids, just two dogs, their dogs are their kids. But who's gonna be there to take care of them when they get older?"
I thought to myself, "Is this why people have kids so that one day they'll have a caretaker."
I said, "What about kids who kill their parents or get on drugs and wind up in prison? Having kids is no guarantee of anything. It's a gamble. And not a gamble I'm interested in. I'm a great Uncle but I'd be a horrible parent and more people should realize they'd be horrible parents and get their tubes tied. The world doesn't need anymore bad parents.'
We went back and forth. Then we got into religion. Then she said something incredibly inappropriate about my mother and her relationship with us kids and then it got ugly. She started crying, which also grossed me out. I can't stand people who say insulting things and then cry when confronted. If you don't want to be confronted keep your damn mouth shut in the first place. I hope she makes my Dad very happy but I'd be content to never see her again. To be fair, she has some lovely qualities; she's outgoing, she dresses well, she keeps a clean house and she likes to laugh and ...she's really fucking bossy. Ooops. See there I go again.
I tried to ignore her on my way out the door but she stopped me and said, "Do I get a hug?" I sold-out and hugged her but had I been on my game I would've said, "Maybe next time." I won't even pretend to like someone who makes insulting comments about my Mother. And I doubt I will ever forgive her for what she said. She tried to apologize but I hate people who apologize for saying something when it's obvious they aren't sorry for what they said only the reaction it caused. I know she believes what she said and no apology is gonna smooth over the damage that she did. She was wrong to say what she said and I was right to confront her. My couples counselor once said, "Would you rather be right or would you rather be happy." I'd rather be right. My mother was a saint. And she loved and accepted all of her children completely. And anyone who thinks otherwise can go fuck themselves. If you want me to hate you, say something negative about my mother and my relationship with her. I dare you, say it. It might just be the last thing you say to me.
And how was your weekend?
