peaceful day. Peace is the thing I value most in my life. More than
sex, even. There is nothing I crave more in my life than peace. It's
sad, on some level, that it took me withdrawing from working in the
theatre to find peace but the day I stopped producing was the
beggining of finding peace. The last year and half have been
incredibly peaceful.
There is an insanity to working in the theatre that is not healthy. I
admire and envy sane people who work in the arts and truthfully I've
only met a few. I'm sure there are lots but I just haven't met many. I
miss the theatre buy only about 5 percent. I miss those moments of
real connection with audiences. But those moments are very fleeting.
I never thought I'd be happy in a small town but now I can't ever
imagine leaving.
My mothers death has also helped me find peace. Watching her die of
cancer over many years devastated me in ways I am only realizing now.
She fought so hard to stay alive. I would've killed myself I think. I
will never be as strong as my parents. They are tough, tough people.
Life is so short. I think about it everyday that ones time on this
planet is incredibly brief and it seems an awful waste of time to live
a life that is not peaceful. For me, peace is everything. I hope it
lasts. I pray it does.
3 comments:
I'm glad you're happy but it would be criminal if you stopped producing theatre altogether. I'll find that truly scary horror script one day and lure you back to the honey pot.
Thank you for being so transparent, funny thing is, I always saw you as semi-selfish, a tough MFer. maybe just 5 levels below, CH.
I am hearten to see the depth of your humility, and I am glad your happy, maybe you would feel better if you involved yourself in a charity of some kind. Your work should be enriching and energizing, not depleting. Maybe if you had a pet to care for, and bound with.
Its easy to feel uneasy theses days with the whole world falling apart, and us here living high on the hog. It maybe a bit of guilt your suffering.
I'm glad you're enjoying retirement.
But how soon before you get BORED out of your mind?
Post a Comment