So Random

Ladies and gentleman.... This is my most random blog entry ever. I'm going to Google the words "Friday Sex Ronnie" and whatever image pops up will be the one I put on the blog....drum roll please...




What the hell???? Oh well, that's what came up. So random. Have a good Friday!

And now I'm off to the 99 cent store to buy a home pregnancy kit. I sell them on eBay for 1.29. It's a great business.

Wait! I just realized that the hole in the middle of the record is quite sexual. You could put your dick in there! It could be a red anus or a musical gloryhole. Hmmmmm, maybe it's not so random after all.

More Cars

My obsession continues with the song Drive by The Cars. I listen to it daily, more times than I care to count. Why is this song haunting me?

(Every time I embed this from YouTube the account hosting the video has to delete it, frustrating indeed!)

The Cars

All the traffic today is on the freeway and not to this blog so I'm posting for you few lonely shut-ins that have nowhere to go but the Internet. Miss Horwitz has descended on Casa de Oceanside but is she hanging out with me? No, the bitch is at the gym. She's obsessed. OBSESSED! Last night we took a lovely walk on the beach at 2 AM and collected lots of intact seashells. My straight neighbor is having a BBQ and he keeps trying to get me to eat one of his hot dogs. "Ronnie, it looks like a penis! Just eat it." I love having straight men beg me to eat their hot dogs!


Now see how it goes! I try to start a nice little post about Memorial Day Weekend and it all ends up a slutty mess with references to straight men and dick. I can't help myself. I apologize.

And speaking of obsession. I can't stop listing to Drive by the Cars. Or is it just Cars? If the name of the band is Cars does one say, "I'm listening to Drive by Cars. That doesn't sound right. Hmmmm. Now I'm perplexed. You wouldn't say, "I'm listening to Hungry Like the Wolf by the Duran Duran. So I guess I'm listening to Drive by Cars.

Update: It's The Cars.

I actually saw Ric Ocasek once in the Village. We passed each other and he looked EXACTLY like he does in the music videos. He's a very odd looking human. And I suspect he likes it that way.

Excerpt from Ocasek Interview:



Do you remember where you were the first time you heard a Muzak version of a Cars song?

It was "Drive" and I was in an elevator [laughs]. I heard the London symphony do "Drive" [also], and that was weird.

Click here and you can listen as well and sing along with the lyrics I've provided.

Drive

Who's gonna tell you when,
It's too late,
Who's gonna tell you things,
Aren't so great.

You cant go on, thinkin',
Nothings' wrong, but bye,
Who's gonna drive you home,
tonight.?

Who's gonna pick you up,
When You fall?
Who's gonna hang it up,
When you call?

Who's gonna pay attention,
To your dreams?
And who's gonna plug their ears,
When you scream?

You can't go on, thinkin'
Nothings wrong, but bye,
(who's gonna drive you)
(who's gonna drive you)
Who's gonna drive you home, tonight?
(who's gonna drive you home)

(bye baby)
(bye baby)
(bye baby)
(bye baby)

Who's gonna hold you down,
When you shake?
Who's gonna come around,
When you break?

You can't go on, thinkin',
Nothin's wrong, but bye,
(Who's gonna drive you)
(who's gonna drive you)
Who's gonna drive you home, tonight?
(who's gonna drive you home)

Oh, you know you can't go on, thinkin',
Nothin's wrong,
(Who's gonna drive you)
(Who's gonna drive you home)
Who's gonna drive you home, tonight?

(bye baby)
(bye baby)
(bye baby)

The Next Jennifer?

First there was Jennifer Holliday, then came Jennifer Hudson and now comes Ronnie Larsen. Should he change his name to Jennifer. Does he earn a place in the pantheon next to those two legends? Watch his version of "And I Am Telling You, I'm Not Going" from one of his favorite musicals, Dreamgirls, and decide for yourself if the the next great "Jennifer" has finally arrived.

Shut Up and Sing

Shut up and Sing focuses on the controversy surrounding a comment the Dixie Chicks made about George W. Bush. The "controversy" is much ado about nothing but I found the documentary fascinating because I find all documentaries fascinating (even bad ones) and I find the Dixie Chicks fascinating. I'm fascinated by their ordinariness. I love insane pop stars as much as anyone but from a distance, please. Could you imagine having dinner with Madonna or Michael Jackson or Ozzy Osbourne? No thank you! But watching Shut Up and Sing felt like hanging out with a cool neighbor or listening to a friendly waitress who just also happens to be a famous pop star involved in a global controversy.

Lately, I find myself attracted to the simple concepts in country music. I've always loved white trash stuff; county fairs, truck stops, trailer parks, Wal-Mart. These days, my life has never been simpler, in fact I'm obsessed with seeing how simple it can get and the Dixie Chicks remind me to keep it simple. I'm sort of obsessed with their hit song, Cowboy Take Me Away. In fact, I'm listening to it right now; it's a beautiful song. So watch Shut Up and Sing! I know I'm rambling, but that's what us Cowboys do, we ramble.

Click here to listen to Cowboy Take Me Away

I've provided the lyrics so you can sing along.

I said I wanna touch the earth
I wanna break it in my hands
I wanna grow something wild and unruly

I wanna sleep on the hard ground
In the comfort of your arms
On a pillow of bluebonnets
In a blanket made of stars

Oh it sounds good to me I said

Cowboy take me away
Fly this girl as high as you can
Into the wild blue
Set me free oh I pray
Closer to heaven above and
Closer to you closer to you

I wanna walk and not run
I wanna skip and not fall
I wanna look at the horizon
And not see a building standing tall

I wanna be the only one
For miles and miles
Except for maybe you
And your simple smile

Oh it sounds good to me
Yes it sounds so good to me

Cowboy take me away
Fly this girl as high as you can
Into the wild blue
Set me free oh I pray
Closer to heaven above and
Closer to you closer to you

I said I wanna touch the earth
I wanna break it in my hands
I wanna grow something wild and unruly
Oh it sounds so good to me

Cowboy take me away
Fly this girl as high as you can
Into the wild blue
Set me free oh I pray
Closer to heaven above and
Closer to you closer to you
Closer to you
Cowboy take me away.
Closer to you

Who are the Bee Gees?

My 26 year old neighbor once asked me who the Bee Gees were. I'm still recovering from the shock of that question. And her favorite movie is Grease. Go figure. Anyway, I hope she wasn't watching American Idol tonight. It was a dreadful night. I was prepared for an evening of my favorite Bee Gees songs, Tragedy, More Than A Woman, How Deep Is Your Love, etc. But instead of hits we got a bunch of songs no one had ever heard and will probably never hear again. Ugh! It was made all the worse by the fact that I watched the whole thing on the treadmill. I felt trapped.

Tragedy!
When the feelings gone
And you can't go on
It's tragedy!

Stevie For A Day

Thankfully, jealousy is not a disease I suffer from. I figured out very young that jealousy is a waste of energy. There is no ones life I would rather be living than my own. HOWEVER, if I could live someone else's life for just a few days I would want to be Stevie Nicks. Whenever I can't decide what music to listen to I always run back to Fleetwood Mac. Gypsy is one of my favorite songs of all time. I spent an hour last night watching Stevie videos on YouTube and reading about her on Wikipedia and it all just seems so unique. There is only one Stevie Nicks; the voice, the hair, the clothes. Oh, to spend a night in her shawls singing that White-Winged-Dove song to the masses. And no, I don't want to be a Nicks impersonator. I want to be her. I want to see the world through her eyes, I want to think with her brain and sing with her vocal cords and greet her fanatical fans. That would be something to experience. But only for a few days. No more than two.

Watch this video and try not feel Stevie envy. And then watch the second video and hear how her voice has gotten richer with time (and cocaine).

More Than A Feeling

When I was a kid I always assumed the rock group Boston were super cool because my ultra-hip brother had their albums in his collection. My brother was a music fanatic and I knew that anything he thought was "cool" should be liked by me as well. So, I was surprised years later to hear that Boston was critically panned when they first came out. I don't know a lot about Boston but many of their songs are my favorite from that time period and hearing them always makes me nostalgic. So I was very sad to learn that Brad Delp, Boston's lead singer, recently killed himself. Very sad, indeed.